Fantasy Forumverse Elections! Vote Now!

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Fantasy Forumverse Elections! Vote Now!

Post by midgetshrimp »

The Fantasy Forumiverse Election!

As last year and simply put, come up with your party, what it stands for and what it is against in its manifesto, who are the members of your party, and why should we vote for you to win the elections? This is a creative writing and thinking contest to come up with the best election promises and speech for your fantasy party.

Remember, this is a fantasy contest so let your imaginations run free! Are you campaining to win the governance of The Elder Cave, or maybe the EC forum chair, or perhaps you want to represent the forumiverse as a whole? It's up to you who you are and what you represent, but remember, pledge anything within (or without) reason for your party and its veiws to get yourself voted in!

And now, as with every election... The Rules:

1. This is a FUN and FANTASY contest. No real world politics please. Parody of the forum politics is allowed.
2. No racist or real-world extremist views, or others that may cause offense. This means no bashing of any religions or sexual preferences, etc.
3. And seeing as this is a "political" contest, bribery is a must! Promising cookies? Cake? A harem of Elder Cave Critters?

Because this is a writing-intensive contest, we have a rough template of how your platform should be presented:

Party Name
Party Leader

Manifesto Pledges (What your party is for/against. Bullet points here make it easier to read. Maximum 5 points for/against each)
Speech (Make your speech here about why your party should be elected into power)

Last year went down to the wire, with the Anarchy Party and the (Inter)National Bull Mousse Party neck and neck til the end! Will one of them rule us all again, or will a new face rise up in revolution?

As always, forum rules apply. No offensive content, and any NSFW bribery must be placed behind appropriate links.

Entries will be accepted until the 26th of June, with voting open until the 30th. This thread is for contest Entries only. Contest discussion should be posted in the appropriate discussion thread.
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Re: Fantasy Forumverse Elections Entry Thread!

Post by Lighthawk »

The Supernatural Online United League
Archmage Lighthawk Presiding

The S.O.U.L. Party Manifesto
• To secure and maintain equal rights for all supernatural forum members; whether they be native, extra-terrestrial, or inter-dimensional; for mortal, immortal, and unmortal alike; regardless if they are unnatural by birth, training, transformation, or possession.
• To protect the online supernatural community from threats both internal and external, such as but not limited to: Vampire hunters, Avenging Spirits, Righteous Heroes, Divinely Appointed Champions, and Forum Trolls; not to be confused with Mountain or Dungeon Trolls, unless of course they are trolling the forum.
• To put into place proper codes of ethics on the research conducted by Mad Scientists, Wizards, and Necromancers.
• To promote understanding of the supernatural in hopes of an eventual union with the natural forum community.

I would like to begin with a few words to my fellow Creatures of the Night, even those that aren’t technically nocturnal. I want you all to know and realize, that you are not alone. I know it can be easy to feel that way, living outside the normal bonds and restrictions of science and natural law. But you are not alone, even those of you who cannot venture outside without your mere appearance risking revulsion, violence, or mind destroying insanity. Even you isolated jobless shut ins still living in your parent’s basement after you were forced to kill and reanimate them to hide the truth of your unnature; you are not alone as long as you have us, as long as you have your S.O.U.L.

I know I can count on the support of all supernatural forum members, because our cause is just and proper for all to see. Acceptance will not come easy or quickly, nor without cost. Getting the normals to accept us will require work and effort from all of us…particularly from those that happen to feed upon human beings. Now don’t get me wrong, I am not trying to place blame, it is by no means your fault that you need to drink human blood, or absorb souls, or eat brains. That is merely your unnature, and there is no reason to be ashamed of it.

Unfortunately, the normals tend to overreact a bit when it comes to parting company with pieces of their body, even though we all know that they can make more blood, that the soul regenerates, and they only use 10% of their brain anyway. But it is their body, and we should be respectful of their right to decide what gets done to and with it.

Therefore I would encourage all vampires, succubi, zombies, eldritch abominations, and any other beings that gain primary sustenance from humans to please consider joining your local chapter of Friendly Feeding. FF is committed to helping pair up supernatural predators with natural prey in mutually beneficial relationships. By working with FF, you can help everyone by ensuring you remain well fed(and thus can resist the urge to stalk and devour the unwilling), that normals remain healthy (and thus tasty), and that no one feels the need to seek holy vengeance against the ‘monster’ that ate his or her friends and/or family.

Speaking of monsters, I now turn my attention to the normals, and their unfortunate use of this ugly term. We are not monsters, though some of us be monstrous in manner or appearance. Monster is a hateful word, it is degrading, and it belittles both the target and the speaker. As a former normal myself, I do understand, even sympathize. When some unknown creature with too many legs and not enough eyes comes gibbering and slobbering out of the shadows with grasping claws and gnashing teeth, it is all too easy to see just a monster. But just because it wants to eat your skin, why should that make it a monster? Does it not have feelings of its own? Does it not dream? If you shoot it in an alarmed panic, does it not ooze an acidic pus?

If we are to see the day when normals and supernaturals can live in peaceful coexistence, to see a day where men and women can walk down a darkened ally without fear of being devoured, a day when the most hideous beast from beyond can enjoy a stroll in the park without being set upon by a torch bearing mob, then we must learn to put aside such labels as ‘monster’. We are all alike in our ability to think, to love, to want to enjoy a meal without having someone trying to ram sharpened bits of metal into our guts.

Once we all can come together and see how much alike we are, we can stop being afraid, and start being a community.
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Re: Fantasy Forumverse Elections Entry Thread!

Post by Azrael »

A year has passed to dust and a new year rises in Red. Again we March against the Freedom crushing Dictatorships your fascist conformism thrust upon Us. We are Chaos. The Minions of Anarchy and Purveyours of Entropy. Your governments are archaic, weak, and soft. The spread and pushing of your stiffling world-views will no longer be tolerated by the Liberty loving peoples of True Freedom. We are everywhere. We are everyone. We are the Fist of Disorder and we will set our booted foot upon the decadent and mealy-mouthed throats of those who think they can enforce rulership upon the masses. No longer will we stand idlely by and allow you to continually degrade and steal the freedoms we have worked and died for, a reckoning is coming. There will be blood. Abandon all hope ye who would stand against our Legions. Fear us, for we come and you will not stop our March. And even so, given a chance to strike a blow for Freedom last year, you instead chose the Noose of Opression. Allowing a SoddenCroc to hold partial sway over the choices of your own lives. Even after we brought down the rule of the Evil Uber-Mod. NOT THIS YEAR! Rise up and smite the enemy. Rise up and crush the Conspiracy. Rise up and take back that which is rightfully yours. Rise up and strike that blow for Freedom, let not your voices go unheard. Rise up, O Peoples of the forae, this is our year, let us raise our Fists in Victory.

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Re: Fantasy Forumverse Elections Entry Thread!

Post by Don Alexander »


Party Leaders: The Ebil Sithlord Don Alexander


We have no need for any manifesto.

We have no need for any speeches.

If not yet in name, then already in deed, We hold the true power in an iron, vise-like grip.

Do not mind the grovelling words of special-interest groups or lying hoodlums who just copy-paste most of last year's manifesto. We, the Evil Über-Mod, are obviously still around. :ymsmug:

Face it.

We rule.

Rest your weary, chaos-plagued souls and give Us the veneer of legitimacy which will allow you to forget about responsibility and live your lives for yourselves.

All Shall Be One.

The Empire Has Arisen.
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Re: Fantasy Forumverse Elections Entry Thread!

Post by Artemisia »

Party Name: The Succubus Party
Party Leader: Amanda Adoria Vouler de la Coeur.
Manifesto Pledges:

1) To institute a policy of more sexy comic strips featuring flirtation and kissing between buxom women.
2) to replace all women on the planet with gorgeous succubi who will turn all men into blithering idiots (thus allowing for the world to be taken over a bit more easily)
3) to ramp up the production of random yaoi pictures thanks to our bisexual corp of beauties.
4) to randomly have orgies at least once a week
5) to ensure that everyone gets to have an equal share of the pie.

1) Split ends
2) Broken nails
3) Make up
4) Boring action movies
5) Even more boring ‘chick flicks’

Our party promises that the world will become a more gorgeous place once men succumb to the allure of The Succubus Party. We shall make sure that the future generations of humanity- mostly incubi and succubi- will be exceedingly attractive and intelligent. Once we are elected into office, there shall be a 1000x increase in the number of gorgeous and well illustrated webcomics, and once all the women have been transformed into gorgeous succubi, we shall then take over the world! (insert evil laughter here)
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Re: Fantasy Forumverse Elections Entry Thread!

Post by TheDude »

The Lurker's League

Semi-lurking Forumverse Liaison Sub-Commitee Chairman Nemo

* we are the majority

* we are silent

* we are always there and you'll never know us

* we most empathically won't tell you about our goals and dreams and most secret convoluted plots

Ever wonder who the "lots of people" are, who won't like the plot twist you detest? Who "most of the readers" are, who ship the same characters that you do? Who "many readers" are, that happen to share your point of view (even when nobody else does)?
It's us the non-posting multitude.
We read your posts, we suck up your lifes, we are always there, but we don't log in.

Due to our special connection with the forumverse and numbering many times more than all you posting people combined we've already won this election - you just haven't noticed it. Therefore you might as well give in and give us your votes!
Don't fight it! You know it's the easy thing to do!
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