The X-mas Ebilness Contest 2011!! *VOTE NOW*

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Moderators: Don Alexander, midgetshrimp

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Who is the ebilest of them all??

Poll ended at Mon Dec 26, 2011 6:18 pm

Lighthawk, who tortures innocent little kittens
5
71%
Don Alexander, who is Zee Ebil Doktor now
2
29%
 
Total votes: 7

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Don Alexander
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The X-mas Ebilness Contest 2011!! *VOTE NOW*

Post by Don Alexander »

The X-mas Ebilness Contest 2011

Once again we gather under the Christmas tree, and...

...dribble hot wax down our neighbour's shirt...
...equip the lametta with laser pointers to madden the cat...
...grind up some roofies in the milk we put out for Santa...

... and are just generally EBIL!! :ymdevil:

Just to remind everyone that Ebil is generally defined as :

1) Pleasantly or cutely evil.
2) Slighly Evil, but without malicious intent.
3) A term to describe something naughty or kinky.

With that in mind, here is the contest. To enter, you have to write a letter to our seasonal deity Beary-Claws (or Frankie-Claus if you prefer :P )in the form of:

"Deary Beary / Frankie -Claws,

I've been very Ebil this year because...

.... Signed (Insert your name here)"

And then explain what you have done to warrant being Ebil in the form of said letter.

Not keeping to this format is not yet deemed ebil enough, but nice try! ;)

And now the obligatory rules!

1. This is an Ebilness Contest, not an Evilness contest. Anything along the lines of 'I beat up x person' or 'I stole x amount of money' or anything deemed bad and jail-worthy rather then ebil is not allowed and will be reported to the proper authorities. Especially under the Deniable Defense Authorization Act!!
2. Only 3 pictures maximum per entry, and these have to be behind links so people have to read the entry, rather then voting directly for a cute/ebil pic. Also, this is because Teen 16 rated nudity (nothing frontal below the belt) will be allowed to demonstrate Ebilness. Please mark entry as Not Work Safe if you use this option!
3. In ammendment to the above, please remember showing boobs or anything else for that matter doesn't signify ebilness, it's just shows a person is either open or an exhibitionist. True Ebilness stems from intent/actions.
4. Please describe real events only, rather then made up ones! Though exaggeration and embellishing the facts are allowed, as that is deemed ebil too.

Normal Forum Guidelines apply.

The prize will be as always... A Shiny Ebilest Forumite Title, chosen by you, and a nice spangly color for your name, and much kudos for winning and being Ebil.

Entry period is from now until the 23rd of December, after which we'll have a 2 day voting period with the winner announced on Christmas Day. WE ARE KEEPING TO THIS SCHEDULE SO NO DILLY-DALLYING!
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Winner of the... 2010 Kilopost FRANKIE; 2010 Mad March Nom Off; 2010 Joker Cleavage Contest; 2010 Fan-Thing Contest; 2010 Mimic Contest (tied); 2011 Joker Cleavage Contest; 2011 Contest-for-the-next-Contest (tied)

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Lighthawk
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Re: The X-mas Ebilness Contest 2011!!

Post by Lighthawk »

"Deary Beary / Frankie -Claws,
I've been very Ebil this year because...
.... Signed (Insert your name here)"


You're doing it wrong...

I am?

*sigh* Yes, you don't need to copy and paste all of that

Just take the keyboard away from him already

Done

Awww....

Dear Frankie Claws,
This year Lighthawk has been very Ebil, especially to us, his adoring kittens...


Aren't we all full grown?

Shut up, it's more Ebil if we're just kittens

Thank you. Anyway...he has been very mean and inhuman to us...

Infeline...

...I am going to eat all your food after this is done, and you will get none

Awwww...

As I was saying...um...

Mean and Ebil...

Yes, very much so. For we are but cute and innocent kittens. I am Ruby, the princess

I'm Hobbes, the buddy

Delilah, the itty-bitty

And this, is our tail, of woe...

Ohhhhhhh....
We beg you please, hear our plea
We poor little kittens three
Save us from this very Ebil man
And thwart his very Ebil plan


Our owner is a big mean putz
He yells at me when I walk on him
And stomp and squish his guts


Our owner is a bullying jerk
He feeds me until my tummy hurts
And I have to puke it up like HURK


Our owner really has to pay
He has a big bag of yummy treats
And only gives us some once a day!


Oh I know, that is just the worst...

Ohhhhhhh....
We beg you please, hear our plea
We poor little kittens three
Save us from this very Ebil man
And thwart his very Ebil plan


He and other owner have fun they don't share
When they play and wrestle on the bed
If I try to join, they toss me to the floor without a care


That's not the only fun he blocks
He sticks odds and ends to keep me out
From climbing in the ceiling, a place that really rocks


Sometimes when I'm cozy, lying in the sun
He comes and pets my tummy and gives my ears a rub
And then wanders off before I let him know I'm done!


*Gasp* Nooooo...

Ohhhhhhh....
We beg you please, hear our plea
We poor little kittens three
Save us from this very Ebil man
And thwart his very Ebil plan


Sometimes he flips me on my back and grabs my paws
And other owner comes with clippy clips
And one by one, they cut off all my claws!


Sometimes he holds me by the scruffs
And rubs me with the scritchy scratchy
And removes my fur in tufts!


Sometimes he sits me in his lap
Where it's warm and comfy and just right
And then gets up in the middle of my nap!


Ugh, he does that to me all the time...

Ohhhhhhh....
We beg you please, hear our plea
We poor little kittens three
Save us from this very Ebil man
And thwart his very Ebil plan


Thwart his...

Very Ebil...

PLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA...

*Smack*!

...AAAAN!

Signed,
Ruby


Hobbes

And Delilah

Three very innocent

And cute!

And totally not exaggerating

little kittens.

How was that? I think that was really good...

Whatever. I'm still going to eat all your food.

Not if I get to it first!

Awwww...
Holder of the Elder Scepter of Ebilnes, Elected Supreme Ruler
"Who are you? I mean, you're me, but I'm me too. How can there be two 'me's? It's not scientifically possible. You are not scientifically possible!" -Twilight Sparkle, to her future self.
Yira wrote:Whatever, labels are stupid. ...Unless it's a label gun, then we're talking tons of fun. "Mine! Mine! Mine! Mine! ...This is an awesome bar stool, but you can have it."

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Don Alexander
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Re: The X-mas Ebilness Contest 2011!!

Post by Don Alexander »

Image

Mwahaha! Muahahahahaaaa! MUAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! *koff, wheez*

It is DONE!!

As lightning tears the sky into flapping grey shards, as squalls of rain leash and cool the remains of my molten apparatus around me, as my tiny minion cowers fearfully in the corner, I raise my hands...

BEHOLD!!!

BEVARE!!!

VITNESSSS!!!!

I am now zee DOKTOR!!! ZEE EVIL DOKTOR GENIUS!!! ALL VERY OFFICIAL!!!!

MADNESS!!! SCIENCE!!! VORLD DOMINATION!!! MINE!! ALL MINE!!!

Dear Frankie Claws, see, I have been verrry ebil!

Signed, zee EBIL DOKTOR!

Image
ImageImage
Sithlord of the Sithling and best customer of McLovecraft's Image, in the business of keeping the little Platypus in business
Moderations in GREEN and signed by the DAMNed. I am not anonymous! Also, MODSMACK!! Image
Winner of the... 2010 Kilopost FRANKIE; 2010 Mad March Nom Off; 2010 Joker Cleavage Contest; 2010 Fan-Thing Contest; 2010 Mimic Contest (tied); 2011 Joker Cleavage Contest; 2011 Contest-for-the-next-Contest (tied)

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