Corrupt-a-Wish

[Swayambhu]

Granted, but the transportation you decide to use explodes without warning, killing you and many, many other people.

I wish I was dead.

[Tenjen]

Strange. I had the same idea to say that swaya.

Granted! But scientists ressurect you with Alien genes and now you have black nails and have Aliens running after you're ass calling you MOMMA!

I wish i could conjure things from my thoughts.

[Pneumonica]

Granted. Unfortunately, your mind wanders when an attractive person walks by you as you first use your power, and you are sued for sexual harrassment.

I wish I was athletic.

[Dirty n Evil]

You spend your last years as a binge-drinking, womanising eccentric.

Hey, that's actually a pretty good end for me, Asaryu!

I wish I was athletic.

Granted - you're in such good shape because you're wanted by the law, and you never know a moment's peace as you constantly run for your life.

I wish Diora Baird loved me.

[Don Alexander]

I wish Diora Baird loved me.

Granted. You meet. Sparks fly. you end up in bed. It is awesome. But you make your ex-wife so jealous that she stalks you, stabs you in cold blood, then beats Diora to death with your hockey stick!

I wish this all were over.

[Asaryu]

Granted. The credits start rolling, the curtains go up. You walk outside, blinking in the sudden light and suddenly find that you need to decide what to do now.

I wish I as better at explaining myself.

[Tenjen]

all the information about you is instantly shoved into peoples minds telephathicly by you.

people's heads explode.

i wish for a soft warm bed.

[Swayambhu]

Wish granted, but the soft, warm bed you're lying in is infested with bed bugs. They suck the blood out of your body through your toes!

I wish I was prettier.

[oni]

granted! Hands you a mirror...only to have it suck out your soul --tagged!

I wish my comments came off as more...sensitive, and my Bod cologn for men actually have women swoon over me.

[Swayambhu]

Granted, but your suave words and manly woman-seeking cologne have wooed women into an unhealthy obsession for you, and they all come together at once to fight over you, tearing your body apart in the process of their little tug-o'-war.

I wish I wasn't sick anymore.

[Lilianna]

Granted. But it involves amputating your throat, and you cannot eat again.

I wish/hope that my boyfriend doesn't GET me sick. Damn his cough!

[cyanide_sweet]

Granted! You are so excited to be in perfect health, that while happy dancing... you accidentally plunge off a cliff

I wish I had a puppy!

[Swayambhu]

Wish granted, but your puppy has rabies and ends up biting you, passing its rabies onto you. Now you're left between the positions of having to go get rabies shots to the stomach, or dying a slow and painful death!

I wish I didn't have a period.

[Lilianna]

Granted. Now you have an exclamation point.

I wish I didn't have to take my physics exam tomorrow.

[Asaryu]

Granted: You are perpetually pregnant. Swollen ankles ahoy!

I wish I knew what not to say and when not to say it.