Pixie Trix Comix & Hiveworks Community

Why are teddy bears never hungry?
Because they're always STUFFED!

Why are pigeons the World's most violent birds?



















They're always crying, "Coup! Coup!"

It's better to have the mind of an antelope than a cantaloupe.

But is a cantaloupe an antelope that can't elope?

Yes, you can write it on an envelope.

Perhaps. But I doubt it would be sanctioned by the Pope.

Nope. (I hope.) ;)

Unless he's high on dope.

Well, I was going to tell you a time travelling joke, but you didn't like it.

Here's another oldie/moldy.

Mussolini is visiting Hitler in Germany. To impress his guest, at the military review, Hitler turns to a soldier and says "Soldier! Shoot yourself in the head!"
The soldier salutes and clicks his heels.
"Jawohl, mein Fuhrer!" the soldier says, pulls out his gun, and shoots himself in the head.
Months later, Hitler is visiting Mussolini in Italy, again at a military review. Mussolini turns to one of his soldiers and orders him to shoot himself in the head. Immediately the soldier looks at Hitler, winks, and says "He drinks before breakfast."

A computer was programmed to translate English into Russian, then back to English again. The programmer submitted "The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak." When the process was over, the computer translation came back as: "The vodka is strong, but the meat is rotten."

I've just come to the realization that Yoda is actually a Min-Max roleplaying character (probably rolled up by Pete.)

The powers of Thor and Hulk combined, at the cost of dwarfism and a speech impediment!!

I'm afraid I got fired from my job at the bank today. An old lady came in and asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

Did you hear about the building manager who lost his mind?
He went from supe to nuts.

What do you get when you cross a cocker spaniel with a maltese?





A Cockatease