28-05-09 Strictly into guys

[Captain Vlad]

A community like that, school or no, is usually short-lived, but well-remembered by everyone who experienced it.

Our class had a lot of 'rich kids', and they mostly occupied any sort of official position. They weren't all jerks; far from it, actually, I remember a girl named Sally very fondly and look forward to seeing her at the next reunion. But there was a certain strata layout it was hard to move around in.

I was lucky because I was freakishly smart. ;) It didn't get me 'in' with any particular crowd, but it sort of helped me exist outside of most of them while still retaining the ability to interact. That ended up being a useful skill in my profession.

[Azrael]

Heh, I love how Lita is being comforting and Gary is actually taking it, it gives me a smile.

[Tenjen]

This goes along with his development into a stronger person. Obviously Asaryu didnt mean his current self, as she was deriding him current self.

Ah. So what he needs to do is create a fake persona and then get women interested in that. Wasn't that a Jerry Lewis movie?

fake persona's dont work because a person cant NOT be themselves for very long without their real selves coming out eventually.

I dont know where you think i meant that. So iam gonna guess it just came from your own mind.

"development into a stronger person"

that means improving and growing oneself. People are not fixed beings but change over time. Their environment influences this chance, but not only do they influence themselves to change but they can influence just how the environmental stimuli changes them. It is possible to go from being a weak willed doormat to a confidant intellectual and leader. Not by faking it, or putting up masks. But through sheer true development of ones persona.

anyway.

I've enjoyed the discussions, both which focused on the serious aspects and the hilarious aspects but now iam taking my leave of this section.

edit: that is until the discussion bug bites me again.

[David Johnston]

fake persona's dont work because a person cant NOT be themselves for very long without their real selves coming out eventually.

I dont know where you think i meant that. So iam gonna guess it just came from your own mind.

"development into a stronger person"

that means improving and growing oneself. People are not fixed beings but change over time

.

By the time someone is 29, they have pretty much become the person they will be for the rest for their lives, barring massive brain trauma. The ability to change and learn declines, and the changes someone can make are increasingly slight.

[Tenjen]

By the time someone is 29, they have pretty much become the person they will be for the rest for their lives, barring massive brain trauma. The ability to change and learn declines, and the changes someone can make are increasingly slight.

This is not a hard given rule. Nor does it truly apply to every person on the planet, its an average of a huge population type and is subject to vast outliers. People are always evolving and changing.

Sheer will and effort can induce change. Maybe as you get older, it just takes more and more effort to do so, but its still possible. If the person wants to change enough, they will go through the effort and toil of becoming a better person.

In H.R., we've learnt that a person NEVER stops learning and changing and growing. The rate may change but it never halts or even becomes as "slight" as you mention. Infact theres people who have adaptability as a personality trait and can adapt themselves to handle any given situation thrown their way or survive in any business [or otherwise] environment. This unique trait can be thought through training. Even the older members of the workforce can be trained. Just need to know how to go about it and to manage it well.

No one is ever "set" in their ways. Not 29, not 50, not 70. That there will always be constant change in all things is the only thing that will never change in all of existance.

[Radbaron]

I was 34 before I had my first flying lesson, that was 8 years ago!

[Kamino Neko]

I volunteer at a senior centre, and...well, my job wouldn't even exist if people stopped learning/growing in their 20s.

[cyberbard]

Gary had better start learning and growing. Right now he's totally intolerable and is giving men a bad name. If he remains stuck in his current mindset, then I truly PRAY that he never gets laid. We don't want to risk passing his genetic material on to the next generation.

Gary should forget about getting laid, and think about growing the f*ck up.

I registered just to say this. That is all.

[Paul]

I started my current career (welder/fabricator) in my 40s with no previous experience. I use skills learned in my previous career (custom photolab tech-turned-graphic artist) to advance the current one.

[Asaryu]

*applauds people for changing careers and/or doing things that make them happy*

Now...I hope Gary can take a lesson from everyone here.

I mean, there is hope. He managed to move out of home, after all. That's a first step, it's just a shame there's been so little progress since then.

[Milnoc]

I went a bit off the deep end myself, and I'm only in my early forties. I quit my well paying job of seventeen years, sold my condo just before the bubble burst, and am now working at launching my own national cable public access television channel. I wanted to see some REAL Canadian content on TV, I had a great idea that successfully got me a license from the CRTC, and I wanted to get into a line of work that would greatly improve my social skills. You don't get that many opportunities working in the IT department of a company whose clients are all in the natural resources sector. I wanted to be around slightly crazy people for a change! And what better place than television!

[Kamino Neko]

I started my current career (welder/fabricator) in my 40s with no previous experience. I use skills learned in my previous career (custom photolab tech-turned-graphic artist) to advance the current one.

Wow, I can't even imagine how those skill sets connect, aside from working with chemicals...and even that's tenuous...

[HotlyContested]

I just want to say this was a fun thread. I enjoyed reading everyone's posts and suggestions for Gary!

As for having one's personality fixed by 29... yes, to a point, but one's outlook can still change greatly, which can influence the way you carry yourself and thus how people perceive you. You may still be the same person, but a lot of the nuances can be totally different.

I can't think of a better example than my high school math teacher. He used to be a miserable s.o.b. who was extremely picky and rigid and who was never happy with anybody. As his student, I never saw him as anything more than a petty, cranky tyrant. A couple of years ago, though, he was diagnosed with multiple myeloma (blood cancer), and in the face of what could have been a death sentence, he decided he wanted to live to see his grandchildren being born. When I visited him in the hospital, I never saw anybody more positive in my life. He was still the same person, but the man that I couldn't stand when he was my teacher was gone, and in his place was this tender, soft-spoken, beautiful human being with every reason in the world to keep on living. I don't think I would have had the courage to do that if I had been in his shoes. It was a remarkable change. He was in his 60's at the time. So, anything's possible.

Oh, lordy... I'm getting teary-eyed. I've had kind of a Gary day...