03-02-18 My greatest fear

[Opus the Poet]

So, Didi has the same problem that Yuki had when she discovered Gary's star power. Selfishness runs rampant when talking sex it seems, but to be fair, men have been using Didi for years, so when she is finally getting something out of it other than, 'so, I'm supposed to lay here, is that IT??' everyone started hating on her (mostly guys it seems too)

When Yuki discovered Gary's star power the first time she nearly killed him.

[Fairy Glade's Fairy]

*This* is how her usual lovers treated her...
Kiley otoh brought her to an orgasm... remember how?
it wasn't that difficult...
she didn't need to use hermetic thaumaturgy...
she just told her words of love & performed lotsa foreplay & whispered sweet nothings in her ear while shagging her... that did the trick...

... in other words, Kiley did the things any man over the age of twelve should know that he gotta do for a woman when they make love......

IMO it's no surprise that DiDi didn't know the orgasm. All her lovers exploited her for their own pleasure, like fucking jerks... noone cared about HER pleasure... grr......

[Varanus]

You're using one scene and neglecting all the others. You're also subscribing intentions that may or may not have existed. Its just as easy to read the above as Didi trying to exploit him for her pleasure (using him basically as a dildo while imagining she was with someone else), the only difference being the guy got an orgasm and she didn't.

Let's not forget Matt either. He was very serious about pleasuring Didi, are you claiming he didn't know how to pleasure a woman? He's a jerk but he's clearly accomplished at lovemaking. Or Erik for that matter, he wouldn't have gotten to be the guy Zii got closest to if he didn't know how to treat a woman, yet he was also unsuccessful with Didi. And Peggy showed it wasn't a male thing either, regular methods of pleasuring someone aren't enough for Didi.

Also, Didi didn't communicate what she wanted or needed, indeed she was outright ignorant of it until Kiley figured it out. Heck, unless that scene was purely a joke Didi deliberately avoided emotional attachments with her lovers, tender behavior, etc. due to how people like that got killed in movies.

[Error of Logic]

In hindsight, some of the sex scenes between Eric and Nielsen confirm this. She would outright tell him what she wanted him to do, he accommodated her, she accommodated him, and they both had a good time.

[Fluffy]

*This* is how her usual lovers treated her...

You cut off the first panel of this strip; you're also ignoring the two previous strips leading up to it - probably because it debunked your entire argument, seeing as Didi is using Adrien to relieve some sexual tension after her night with Sandra proved to be an utter failure and Matt wasn't an immediate option at that point. Hell, she's literally calling Matt's name as Adrien is trying to satisfy her, and is outright ignoring Adrien's corrections because, to Didi, her release is far more important than who's trying to get her there.

Truth be told - they're using each other (Didi for sexual release and Adrien to re-affirm his heterosexuality); but at least Adrien knows Didi's name.

As for KIley whispering sweet nothings to Didi - uh, no. She gave her an example, and the rest was largely explanation while doing her thing.

[Fairy Glade's Fairy]

You cut off the first panel of this strip; you're also ignoring the two previous strips leading up to it - probably because it debunked your entire argument, seeing as Didi is using Adrien to relieve some sexual tension

You cut off 90% of my argument; you're also ignoring the two previous messages by TFO & Vito leading up to it - probably because it smashed to smithereens you entire delusion, seeing as there's no defending a man who doesn't know

the things any man over the age of twelve should know that he gotta do for a woman when they make love.

Wham Bam Thank You Madam just doesn't cut it, neither for Didi nor for 99% of women out there... taking their pleasure, leaving without satisfying her, then crying when Didi dumps them because 'boohoo she doesn't think of my feelings' is pure toxic hypocrisy... even Matt's solution to the problem was 'she just needs someone like me who fucks longer and harder!'... it's astounding that in this day and age there's still people like you willing to defend this Wham Bam caveman approach to relationships..... Kiley made it so easy, and yet not even one of those dumb apes ever thought of romancing Didi, just fucking & more fucking...

oh btw speaking of Kiley:

As for KIley whispering sweet nothings to Didi - uh, no. She gave her an example, and the rest was largely explanation while doing her thing.

WOW! retcon much? yer like really really out of touch here.....
reread the "1st orgasm" arc, it's not long and you srsly need to refresh your memory... I can't believe anyone could forget Doña Juana de Montréalo and her hour-long work of pouring on the charm and whispering tender loving words to Didi... even while doing her fingerwork down there she was still whispering all the right things in Didi's ear......

I mean, heck, it was like Kiley's Crowning Moment of Awesome in the series......

[Varanus]

Why didn't you respond to anything I or Error of Logic pointed out? I thought we explained our perspective on this pretty well. Or the fact the entire thing with Adrien was Didi's idea and under Didi's control. It just seems a reach to make Didi a victim in those cases.

Heck, "wham bam" is the approach the vast majority of characters in this strip, male and female alike, take to sex and it works pretty well for them most of the time. Its not their fault that their world works like this, or that Didi is inexplicably not able to work that way.

I mean again, by all accounts Didi did NOT want her lovers to be tender, she wanted raw passion and to avoid or not care about emotional attachment. And even once she realized she needed that emotional attachment, she's been rather poor at genuinely reciprocating it.

I don't think anybody is really defending the way Didi's past relationships worked, obviously genuine romance is better, but at the same time it seems a contradiction to condemn the men when it was how Didi wanted to be treated and she treated the men the SAME way. Indeed it could be argued the guys did better in the sense that they at least bothered to remember her name.

[TheFoolishOne]

Thank you Fairy Glade

[Error of Logic]

Perhaps we should say that everyone involved in Chastel's entanglements should have communicated better?

Yes, the men she was with appeared to disappoint her by launching too soon. But at no point did we see Chastel so much as request long foreplay - and she did not tell most of them she was not having her needs satisfied.
None of the men we saw Chastel with acted like knuckle-dragging savages, shrugging off their partner's disappointment so long as they got theirs. The ones who learned they never managed to satisfy Chastel seemed genuinely surprised, even upset. To some degree, they were all infatuated with her - in most cases for superficial reasons, but none of them treated her as though she was disposable and her needs were irrelevant.

Yes, the men could - no, should! - have been more attentive, and they could have taken some precautions and spent more time. But also yes, Chastel could have been more vocal and expressed her needs. As little as saying "J'ai difficulty reaching l'orgasme, can we take it slow?" might have made so much difference. If Chastel feels infatuation, feels she is adored as well as desired, she can get where she wants to go.

I adore Kiley, but she was not experienced with lesbian sex when she brought Chastel to orgasm. She took the time to get her there, and engaged her emotionally as well as physically.
Eric and Adrien aren't braindead cavemen who dragged Chastel into a cave so they could have their way with her. Yes, they should have noticed something was wrong; Chastel's facial expressions are hardly ambiguous. That said, while they're clearly not brain surgeons, they could understand their partner needs more than the bare bones of coïtus and do their best to accommodate her - if they had just been informed of the need to do so. Given how people tend to adore Chastel, they'd probably have leapt at the chance to expand and deepen their knowledge of Chastel and their role in her life.
As for Matt... he is apparently technically skilled at sex, but he's a tomcat. His emotional involvement in sex is usually dubious at best. Small wonder he failed to get Chastel across the finish line.

[Fluffy]

You cut off 90% of my argument; you're also ignoring the two previous messages by TFO & Vito leading up to it

Why address all three of you when all three of you have the exact same argument? It's needless repetition. Also, you're the one who edited a comic strip to prove your point that men used Didi - when that same strip began with Didi calling her lover by a different man's name, showing she was using him just as much as he was using her.

probably because it smashed to smithereens you entire delusion, seeing as there's no defending a man who doesn't know

What delusion, dude? These are facts, from an established story line. Didi can't communicate her feelings worth a damn - she faked her orgasm with every man, leading them to believe they had satisfied her. How is a man supposed to know anything when their lover in utterly incapable of communicating her feelings. Here's a shocker - Men aren't mind readers! If Didi was sexually unsatisfied - it's up to her to say something.

Wham Bam Thank You Madam just doesn't cut it, neither for Didi nor for 99% of women out there...taking their pleasure, leaving without satisfying her, then crying when Didi dumps them because 'boohoo she doesn't think of my feelings' is pure toxic hypocrisy...

Not when Didi faked her orgasm every time. Why are they going to think any differently if Didi herself is letting them think they've satisfied her?

even Matt's solution to the problem was 'she just needs someone like me who fucks longer and harder!'... it's astounding that in this day and age there's still people like you willing to defend this Wham Bam caveman approach to relationships.....

And, guess what? He was making some real progress - until Didi ruined it for herself by sabotaging things (first with the hot sauce, then by calling Gary's name while Matt was trying to satisfy her).

WOW! retcon much? yer like really really out of touch here.....
reread the "1st orgasm" arc, it's not long and you srsly need to refresh your memory... I can't believe anyone could forget Doña Juana de Montréalo

You mean the scenario that was largely taking place in Kiley's head? Yes, Kiley was being gentle with her in order to get her to open up/relax - but romantic? Only in Didi's mind (Kiley wanted to up and leave as soon as it was over - but got roped into a 'relationship' with this orgasm obsessed twit until she used Didi's love of wrestling to get out of it).

Yeah - that's really romantic there.

[Vitocap]

To some degree, they were all infatuated with her - in most cases for superficial reasons, but none of them treated her as though she was disposable and her needs were irrelevant.

Well, they certainly talked that way... but...

I've often noticed that, in this comic, there tends to be a gap between what the characters claim to be/need/want/feel and what their actions actually show about them. (In fact, it's a major source of humor -- "I'm not a lesbian" Sonya is a prime example.) In the case of Eric and Adrien, they claimed to be heartbroken over DiDi, were sobbing and getting drunk and everything... then accepted Zii's invitation, spent the night in a threesome with her, and, the next day, one of them declared he was now in love with Zii and the other moved over to Sophie the deli girl. Honestly, in the light of that, it's kind of difficult to take seriously their initial protestations of love for DiDi... a more likely reason for their angst could be, perhaps, the realization that they would never again get in bed with such an incredible sexbomb.

On a separate note: ah, Kiley -- who would have thought, when we first met her, that she would become such an extraordinarily important character? In the beginning, the two biggest topics in the comic were that DiDi couldn't get an orgasm and Gary couldn't get laid. Attempts to solve these problems always failed, and we readers were led to believe that the status quo, as in a typical TV sitcom, would continue unchanged forever. Then Kiley arrived, had sex with Gary, gave DiDi an orgasm, and Ma3 was never again the same. Whoa!!! Well done, girl! Way to go!

(It's even more amazing when you recall her origins as a one-strip joke character whose only role was to look tiny, mousy and dejected as DiDi, in all her statuesque blonde Amazon glory, strolled by her. Yup. )

[Fluffy]

In the case of Eric and Adrien, they claimed to be heartbroken over DiDi, were sobbing and getting drunk and everything...

She broke up with them over text so she could have a go with Sandra. Adrien even points out that they've dated before, and he's waited on her numerous times - and she *still* doesn't even know his name. What person wouldn't be heartbroken over that?

Honestly, in the light of that, it's kind of difficult to take seriously their initial protestations of love for DiDi... a more likely reason for their angst could be, perhaps, the realization that they would never again get in bed with such an incredible sexbomb.

Doubtful. Erik seemed perfectly content finding love with Zii (even though it felt more like a rebound relationship - far too quick to last long); and, after buying sausages from Sophie, Adrien crossed paths with Didi (who was sexually frustrated) and they hooked up for a quickie - where, again, Didi spent the duration of their love making thinking of (and calling out for) Matt; much to Adrien's chagrin. Regardless, it wasn't even a day after she dumped him that Didi welcomed Adrien back into her bed.

Just as you have a hard time believing the guys proclamations of love for Didi; I have a very hard time believing Didi gave a flying fig for any of the lovers she's been with (men and women alike) - past what they could give her, of course.

[Spidrift]

Eric and Adrien aren't braindead cavemen who dragged Chastel into a cave so they could have their way with her. Yes, they should have noticed something was wrong; Chastel's facial expressions are hardly ambiguous.

Actually, she was shown smiling broadly (as well as making a lot of ecstatic-sounding noises) while having sex with Erik. It was only after the fact, when Erik had literally been shagged into a stupor and she was facing away from him, that her expression became unhappy.

Erik for one gets a pass from me for not realising there was a problem.

[Fluffy]

For the longest time, Adrien was just as clueless to being a failure in sexually satisfying Didi; until he overheard her admitting to Sandra that no man had ever given her an orgasm while he waited on them, and confronted her about it.

[Cortez]

DiDi never told the guys there was a problem.