Gunslinger Girl - Questions About the Seven Seas Translation

[Sheller]

First off, since I haven't said it earlier, I'd like to thank the wonderful folks at Seven Seas for bringing the Gunslinger Girl license back to the States. I'm holding my copy of the omnibus right now, and it is awesome to have. Props to you!

However, I do have some questions to ask the translation staff (if they are available) about the translation of a certain line in the first chapter. When the doctor is describing what happened to Henrietta during her ordeal, he explicitly states that she was raped and beaten throughout the night. To my knowledge (which is, at best, incomplete), previous translations have phrased that line to be more ambiguous, choosing words like "was savaged" or just "beaten." I have no issue with making what was subtext in previous translations explicit; I simply wonder what the original Japanese line said, and if there was any ambiguity in it.

In a surprising (if mild) reversal, when Triela mentions her menstrual cramps to Henrietta, Henrietta's subsequent mention of the removal of her own uterus is changed from explicit ("they took out my uterus") to slightly implicit ("they took it all out"). Again, I wonder what the original line was, and if it contained such ambiguity.

I apologize for being such a nitpicker. I'm trying to delve into the nuances of the words chosen by the characters, and the subtle changes in the translations introduce a slightly different tone than was present in the previous versions. I'm sure that I'll have more questions later; the only reason I do not have more now is that I'm holding back from reading the entire volume at once, so as to savor the experience. One release every 3+ months is a long, but bearable, wait.

Thanks,
~Sheller

[blkglyph]

First off, since I haven't said it earlier, I'd like to thank the wonderful folks at Seven Seas for bringing the Gunslinger Girl license back to the States. I'm holding my copy of the omnibus right now, and it is awesome to have. Props to you!

You're welcome, and thanks for picking it up! I'm Janet Houck, the adaptation writer. Everyone put in a lot of hard work to make this a high-quality omnibus volume, so it's great to hear that people are enjoying the fruits of our labor.

However, I do have some questions to ask the translation staff (if they are available) about the translation of a certain line in the first chapter. When the doctor is describing what happened to Henrietta during her ordeal, he explicitly states that she was raped and beaten throughout the night. To my knowledge (which is, at best, incomplete), previous translations have phrased that line to be more ambiguous, choosing words like "was savaged" or just "beaten." I have no issue with making what was subtext in previous translations explicit; I simply wonder what the original Japanese line said, and if there was any ambiguity in it.

The doctor does say that Henrietta was beaten and raped. I can't say for certain why other translations have toned it down, whether due to Henrietta's young age or because the scene is right at the beginning of the book. Jose uses "brutalized" later on in the volume, but it makes sense for him to dodge the issue, Henrietta being his surrogate sister and all.

In a surprising (if mild) reversal, when Triela mentions her menstrual cramps to Henrietta, Henrietta's subsequent mention of the removal of her own uterus is changed from explicit ("they took out my uterus") to slightly implicit ("they took it all out"). Again, I wonder what the original line was, and if it contained such ambiguity.

The original line has Henrietta saying that they had to take out her womb, which does not sound like how Henrietta talks like. I envision Henrietta at the start of the series (she does grow *a lot* during the past six volumes I've completed) as a shy, middle school girl, who has a lot of confidence issues. She wouldn't be using the word "womb" -- it's just not in her vocabulary or thinking pattern. (Triela would, but that's besides the point...) Henrietta, in a private conversation with a close friend, would think "they took it all out" as all the explanation that is needed.

I apologize for being such a nitpicker. I'm trying to delve into the nuances of the words chosen by the characters, and the subtle changes in the translations introduce a slightly different tone than was present in the previous versions. I'm sure that I'll have more questions later; the only reason I do not have more now is that I'm holding back from reading the entire volume at once, so as to savor the experience. One release every 3+ months is a long, but bearable, wait.

Thanks,
~Sheller

Coolio. I hope you enjoy our adaptation as much as we enjoy creating it!

[Sheller]

I hope you enjoy our adaptation as much as we enjoy creating it!

Oh, most definitely. I smiled when I read Christiano's new line in "How Beautiful My Florence Is", where he remarks that "for a child to be an assassin, they would have to undergo much strenuous training." A nice, subtle hint that he has experience with child soldiers. Head and shoulders above the ADV version ("Even kid assassins would have to undergo some pretty rough training").

I had to chuckle when you described Henrietta as "shy." It's so true, but her face when she answered the door for Pietro and Elanora in "The Death of Elsa de Sica" was pure, hardcore predator. She had the "step off" look down pat. She's a complex character for sure.

I just finished the omnibus, and I really do like the translation. The side characters' lines seem clearer and help define their personalities (despite people like Amadeo getting enough lines to count on one hand).

Honestly, the only line I found out of place was Henrietta's choice of words after she is tackled by Jose in "Death" part 2. "I don't have any reason to commit suicide" seemed a little clinical for her; why were phrases like "kill myself" passed over? Again, just curious.

It's great to be able to talk to one of the people working on the project. You've made my day, Janet!

[Adam_Arnold]

Honestly, the only line I found out of place was Henrietta's choice of words after she is tackled by Jose in "Death" part 2. "I don't have any reason to commit suicide" seemed a little clinical for her; why were phrases like "kill myself" passed over? Again, just curious.

It really depends what we're given from the translator to work with. Since no two translators will ever turn in the exact same phrasing for a line, sometimes it can can just come down to an individual translator's own writing style, vocabulary (and dictionaries they use), and/or personal preference for how a line is rendered.

Probably the most important thing to keep in mind is that we're not doing a literary translation, so while Seven Seas does strive to be as authentic as possible, the ultimate goal for us is... does the book read well and will it engage the reader? So it's best not to nitpick too much since there's no exact science to translation or adaptation.

[blkglyph]

Oh, most definitely. I smiled when I read Christiano's new line in "How Beautiful My Florence Is", where he remarks that "for a child to be an assassin, they would have to undergo much strenuous training." A nice, subtle hint that he has experience with child soldiers. Head and shoulders above the ADV version ("Even kid assassins would have to undergo some pretty rough training").

I had to chuckle when you described Henrietta as "shy." It's so true, but her face when she answered the door for Pietro and Elanora in "The Death of Elsa de Sica" was pure, hardcore predator. She had the "step off" look down pat. She's a complex character for sure.

I just finished the omnibus, and I really do like the translation. The side characters' lines seem clearer and help define their personalities (despite people like Amadeo getting enough lines to count on one hand).

Honestly, the only line I found out of place was Henrietta's choice of words after she is tackled by Jose in "Death" part 2. "I don't have any reason to commit suicide" seemed a little clinical for her; why were phrases like "kill myself" passed over? Again, just curious.

It's great to be able to talk to one of the people working on the project. You've made my day, Janet!

To set up the scene, Henrietta is enacting what she thinks Elsa did, rather visually with her gun pointed at her face. All the adults are alarmed, but since this is Henrietta, only Jose's reaction counts. He responds as how she wanted him to, by running to "save" her. As Pietro and Elenora say afterwards, that was definitely a passive-aggressive gesture by Henrietta. "Love me or I'll die."

Now, I think once reassured of Jose's continued affection, Henrietta immediately saw his distress, and how she was the cause of it. It's important to remember that Henrietta at this stage of the story is very emotional and swings from high to low and then high again, very much like a middle schooler in love or someone suffering from having hormones out of whack. She quickly reassures him that she wasn't going to shoot, that "You're really nice to me, Signor Jose... I don't have any reason to commit suicide," distancing herself from Elsa's crazy level of obsession. She doesn't want Jose to think that *she* is suicidal, because the agency would put her in the hospital and she wouldn't get to see Jose.

Yes, I do think Henrietta can be manipulative, but as an inexperienced teenage girl, I feel Henrietta's threat was quite idle, along the lines of "Fine, but I'll never talk to you again!" And I think that thought came straight out of her mouth without much thought, rushing to reassure Jose that she is okay. Remember that we've also seen the beginning of Henrietta's memory loss, and she is aware of it. Henrietta visits Angelica, and she has to know why Angelica is hospitalized. Henrietta doesn't want Jose to even suspect any tiny thing is wrong with her.

Anyways, there's a lot of words to sum up that Henrietta is trying to keep her public face intact, but is very swayed by her emotions. I'll check back in the forum every few days to see if anyone else has questions or comments. I write all of the characters as multi-faceted, with complex motivations, so it's nice to hear that readers are feeling that as well.

[Sheller]

I write all of the characters as multi-faceted, with complex motivations, so it's nice to hear that readers are feeling that as well.

My word. I can barely remember what it was like to be a middle-schooler, let alone decipher the thoughts of one. That clears things up nicely; your explanation has actually allowed me to enjoy the series more, just because I can finally get an idea of what Henrietta was trying to prove consciously when she had her little demonstration. Paradoxically, it was pretty clear to me what she may not have intended to say, but what she had intended to say was a muddied mess. Kids!

Thank you, Janet, for the insight into what exactly happened there, and why you chose those specific words. I'm looking forward to what you and your team decide to do with Rico, for whom I'm still trying to determine if she undergoes character development. Jean gets a good deal of the limelight in later volumes, but Rico... well... doesn't seem to change that much. Given that Jean clamps down on her pretty tightly (through conditioning or disposition), I'm not certain if she's even able to change.

Cheers!